I was my mom’s third child, and my dad’s first. As a gift to him, she gave him full creative freedom to name me: first and middle. After a couple weeks of thought, my dad settled on Deitrich if I were a boy, and Brenda if I were a girl. My middle name is a family name.
Cue Beyoncé. Because if I were a boy, I’d like my name a lot more!
I’ve had a difficult relationship with my name since childhood. It never really fit me. I used to call myself all kinds of things when I was little, and my elder sisters usually called me “Bee,” while bullies on my school bus would say, “Hey, Bren-duhhhhh!”
In the fourth grade, we were given the opportunity to take on new identities for our Old West social studies unit. I became Victoria. So much more regal than Brenda!
I remember trying on different names in the mirror: Vanessa. Cameron. Diana. Genivieve. Jade. Serena.
While combing my hair I’d repeat them as I gazed into my own eyes (how witchy of me…) and tested name after name, looking for one that wasn’t just fun to say but would somehow light up my eyes.
By the end of elementary school, I had switched from using my given name to “Lucy,” my middle name, and this stuck through high school.
Shortly after college, I began using a Hebrew name in some online spaces. It didn’t fit me any better than my legal name did but I liked that it was, in essence, spiritual and ancestral. It connected me to my Jewish heritage. I was raised in a semi-secular, semi-Catholic household, so it was one of the only shreds of a Jewish spiritual life I really had. The problem was, I wasn’t spiritually Jewish.
I was pagan, and a witch to boot. Despite being in magical spaces from age 13, and even as my spiritual life matured, I never truly considered taking a “craft” name.
That all changed after my daughter was born and I, once again, confronted how much weight I place into names.
What is a Craft Name?
To put it simply, a Craft Name is the name you take in spiritual, magical, or witchy communities. It is meant to sanctify your identity away from (or in conjunction with) the profane. Some people choose to adopt their Craft Name fully, others use a blend (“Kayla” + “Moonstone”), and others keep it secret and reveal their Craft Name only to their guides, gods, or covens.
There are countless spiritual teachings around names found in the world’s cultures, and depending on your background you could easily tie your Craft Name into one of those tomes of lore.
A common theme is that names are consistently recognized to carry not only meaning, but power. As magic is often thought to be spoken, then a name is an extension of that magic.
There have been a series of studies in recent years that show people are also affected by their name, with everything from a person’s personality to their physical appearance able to be altered.
Some cultures traditionally bestow a single person with multiple names. These may be names that are for a specific purpose. Some names are used with outsiders, spoken only within the family unit, between child and parent, or with one’s spouse or spiritual leader.
How I Named My Children
My husband and I took this to heart when we were exploring names for our two children. For our daughter, we ultimately gave her three legal names: a first name and two middle names, all chosen for the magic they carry. But she also has a secret fourth name, which I will share with her to use (if she wishes) when she is older.
Our son also has 3 legal names: all chosen for the stories they carry. While we wished to bestow ancient magics to our daughter, to our son we wanted to gift legend, ancestry, and reaching across time.
Renaming the Self with a Craft Name
If I could go back in time and rename myself by telling my father which name I preferred, I would – so why not do it now?
If I’m being honest, my childhood self would be surprised that I’m in my 30s and have yet to legally change my name. But I haven’t come across the one that fits me, nor encapsulates the woman I want to become. No matter how many times my ten-year-old self muttered Vanessa in the mirror, I’m not a Vanessa. I’m not a Lucy. Nor am I a Sarai Ora.
For those involved in a spiritual community, whether they’re druids or witches or healers or psychics, they are usually given the opportunity to take a new name upon completion of the first year or so of their studies. Of course, not everyone is keen to take this on. Some choose to take the name of their patron deity as a new “surname,” while others choose entirely new names to use within their grove, coven, or circle. As a solitary practitioner, I’ve never had someone kick down my door and declare that I’m ready to take a name. If someone had, I’m sure I would’ve taken the opportunity!
If you’re in the same boat as I am, here’s my advice:
You don’t need someone else’s permission to rename yourself. While it can feel affirming and earned when a mentor or teacher gives us this chance, it is valid for those on the solitary path to hear this “call” from Spirit itself – whether spoken within you or through your guides.
Advice for Taking a Craft Name
1. Choose Wisely
The first decision needs to be a private one. This name is going to be yours, so take time to consider more than face value of the name or what others may think. I’d say that a “good” name for a spiritual, ambitious, changemaking and creative person like you is one that feels accurate to both your personality and your Soul Self.
Have you spent time with your Soul Self recently? If not, try a quick grounding exercise. Put your hand on your heart and breathe. Feel the ground beneath your feet hold you. Find a state of calm peace. What’s a name that holds who you become in that head state, while also holds you at your “drinking wine and dancing to Beyoncé in the kitchen on a Sunday night” energy? (Or whatever your equivalent is!)
I believe a spiritual name is something that encapsulates your essence, while also encouraging the playfulness and mundane reality of being a human being in a complex world.
Many wild and witchy women, as I mentioned before, tend to select the name of a deity or mythological figure they work with and adapt it into their name. Others choose words from the natural world to craft something unique. Many name lists online suggest names from the natural world, too, or celestial bodies.
But practicing an earth spirituality doesn’t mean your name choices need to be limited to options derived from nature. Being pagan is also about exploring the depth of archetypes and psychospiritual experiences that make up our fascinating inner world. Thus, names that evoke those archetypes, myths, heroes, or memories are beautiful choices, whether they’re from the collective experience or personal experience.
2. Take your time connecting with your new name
Before making a ritual of it, I’d recommend you keep your newly decided name to yourself for at least a few lunar cycles. If you’re truly ready to keep this name for a long time, this practice shouldn’t be too much of an interruption. Speak your new name aloud often, especially in the mirror, in the bath, or late at night. Allow yourself time to see if the connection is genuine.
Of course, waiting any length of time isn’t required. Personally, I find that my mental state can seriously influence my likes and dislikes, and my mental state can change pretty easily with the seasons. I’m a very different animal in winter than I am in the summer! I’d wait awhile just to be sure that the many versions of myself that I experience and express can wear the name.
If you’ve had an idea for a name for awhile, you could consider testing it with a few friends or others close to you before committing fully.
3. Make it official!
There are basically three ways of doing this. If you’re part of a grove, coven, or other pagan or spiritual group or community, check with them if there are any rituals they have in place to facilitate your “re-birth” into this new name and identity. Chances are, they have this – or might even expect it of you at the one year mark!
If your community is more casual, you can invite people to a ritual yourself! Ask someone you trust to co-facilitate, and announce your new name and meaning to a group of witnesses. You can easily set something like this up over a Zoom call, light a few candles, and have a go.
If I were to do this, for example, I’d probably share some of the poems and associations that inspired my name, and share who I hope to be as a result of taking it.
On the other hand, if you’re a solitary practitioner (like me) and want to make it official while solo, there are a variety of rituals to suit whichever path you follow. I’ve come across more than one ritual for lightworks, witches, druids, and other neo pagans.
If you’re not comfortable sourcing a ritual and performing it yourself, you could always reach out to a temple, circle, or grove that offers ritual services to non members. Expect a fee or be prepared to offer a small donation.
The Path to Choose My Own Name
A year ago, I found the name I wanted to adopt for myself. I’m still trying it on and haven’t shared it too widely yet. I’m currently planning to publish a series of poems under that name as an offering to it, a way to strengthen it, before I share it back into the world with my face attached.
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